If one would compare a person who hardly speaks with someone who frequently does, it is much easier for the person who hardly speaks to have her throat hurt.
That’s the case for me who usually doesn’t talk at all. If it isn’t necessary to open my mouth while casting magic then I wouldn’t do so.
.
I am not used on talking and, on top of that, I shouted without using my diaphragm and that one time was enough for me to get a sore throat.
.
I am not fond of being in front of many people but I can feel the gazes of everyone around pierce me.
However, I don’t have the time to be bothered by such inconvenient matter.
.
I, who is so irritated that my own voice doesn’t have the power to make my childhood friend turn around, ran. I cough and grasp for air while avoiding people’s eyes as I run.
.
I wasn’t able to buy the magic potions. But I couldn’t care less.
.
…Ah, not here.
This isn’t right. Not there too.
This isn’t the time for me to break down and cry.
.
[…Haa, haa….]
.
Am I pathetic for not being a person who has great stamina?
I hurriedly ran to the walls of the house that looks deserted of people as I lean and let my back slid before sitting down.
.
Slow down your breathing.
Calm down. Calm down…
Am I running out of breath because of my lack of stamina? Or because of the mental fatigue that’s been gobbling me up?
.
–I brace myself as I open the letter in my hand.
.
..
I can’t believe Emmy’s the one who written the words inside it.
It’s plainly written in a calm tone backed with facts and objectivity.
However, the content itself is…
.
[Emmy…]
.
The letter that might as well be the last remembrance my childhood friend had given me was burned in my hands without hesitation.
Then, I used my wind magic to scatter the ash and leave no evidence.
.
I can’t let it be seen by anyone else.
Especially that woman.
.
When Emmy has been bestowed the class of the [Holy Knight], I thought that more than Emmy being suited for the class… I believe she’s really meant to be one.
She’s such a little cry baby princess but the one who is so sweet that she cries over other people’s injuries… She’s a crybaby of the same age as me but a really cute princess.
The person who has most of the things I lack.
.
Maybe that’s why.
On that day, at that moment… Emmy destroyed the very thing she wanted to protect. I can feel myself vomiting blood just imagining how heavy the burden it had dealt.
.
…Katie.
She’s the person I am afraid the most right now.
.
I’ve always love reading books since I was a child.
There’s the fun of being able to learn something new and—it’s something I know that isn’t good about me but—enjoying a sense of superiority is one of the reasons I pursue new knowledge.
.
The stories of the Hero, the Holy Maiden, and… the dungeon.
As the difficulty goes higher, the information becomes more valuable. That’s why the front-runner adventurers don’t even whisper a thing outside and even the previous generation’s hero party didn’t leave anything behind.
The traces of their activities that they left behind are just the ‘Hero’s Bravery’, and the ‘Legends of the Holy Maiden’, which didn’t tell anything aside from their showy achievements.
They didn’t leave anything that could as well be used for exploring the dungeons.
.
I considered everything about it.
The contents of what Katie-san said isn’t mentioned from any books.
.
Where’s that person been from all this time?
Why is such a person not being talked about from all this time?
How can such a beautiful person get past on Vince who often walks around the city all this time?
.
More than anything, how can such a brilliant person who’s almost virtually sparkling under the sun with her long golden hair like some high-quality harlot be able to get on touch with us without being noticed by anyone?
And… just why did she approach us.
.
I don’t understand anything about it.
.
I’ve always love reading books since a long time ago.
There’s the uneasiness going into the unknown without any knowledge and— it’s something I know that isn’t good about me but— loathing my sense of inferiority is one of the reasons I pursue new knowledge.
.
Katie-san is, without a doubt, more knowledgeable than me.
The knowledge she has isn’t something that can be found in the books.
.
I am aware and admit the worst parts of me and this is how I look at it honestly.
That person’s eyes… Her pure, unblemished, oozing with compassion and undying golden eyes… it feels like they are from somewhere else looking down on me. I can’t help but be scared just thinking about it.
.
What should I do from now on?
I’d have to go and find Vince first. I’m thinking that he might be on the weaponry checking some things out but I suddenly thought about the wet market where stalls of street foods are open and started to walk there.
And as I expected, Vince is loitering in front of stall of skewers.
.
[Vince.]
[N? Oh, Jannet. What’s up?]
.
Eating itself isn’t something one should be ashamed about but how can you still act so big? Ofcourse, I’m being sarcastic.
.
[I’m going to meet Katie-san from here. Come with me as well, Vince.]
[Something happened?]
[Yep. But one thing… Does Vince believe in my thinking?]
[Of course. Our party won’t be going anywhere without your thinking in the first place.]
.
Un. Being relied upon doesn’t feel that bad.
Being able to use the knowledge I accumulated for the benefit of the party is really delightful. It comes convenient in times like these too.
.
[I’m glad to hear it. Just don’t speak and believe in me, okay? As long as you believe in me, everything will turn out to be alright.]
[Ah, oh… Okay.]
.
After getting Vince’s confirmation as he forcibly nods his head with such an uneasy face, I went to Katie-san.
.
[Ara, welcome back.]
[yeah, we’re back!]
.
Vince greeted back Katie-san then I have him move behind me.
.
[We have returned. And, there’s something I’d like to talk about.]
[Hm? What could it be?]
.
I then started to talk about Emmy.
.
[Emmy has a childhood friend who’s a boy and has nothing really that special.]
.
Vince was… Coughing like his throat got an itch from behind… I’m asking you a favor, just please shut up.
.
I can see surprise and wonder behind Katie-san’s eyes.
I’m sure she’s starting to get her head fully working with just one sentence. This well-endowed beauty thinks really fast.
.
[And Emmy… She hurt that childhood friend herself so she decided to go back home and ran away to apologize…]
[…That’s… What terrible thing I’d done…!]
.
With just that, Katie-san fully figured out what I wanted to say and started to cry.
I’m sure those tears are true. There’s a party of female bandits who use fake tears so I can tell whether it’s true or not.
.
She must have had good intentions.
That’s why I… can’t help but get more scared of Katie-san.
.
One should be weary against malicious enemies.
Wearing an armor and using a shield to receive attacks can lessen the damages no matter how strong they are.
.
But, what if.
Beneath everything and inside you is a hand holding a knife ready to stab you at any moment. How can you avoid it?
…Katie-san is precisely like that.
She’ll rip any one to shreds with just her good intentions.
.
Emmy thought of this too but I too think that Katie-san is a party crusher that leads men by their nose. I only thought of her up to that extent.
…My knowledge, wisdom, and insight are insufficient. That’s how far I was able to look at it.
.
This person is unknowingly crushing a party regardless of genders. A real destroyer.
.
That might be too farfetched but I still have what Emmy told me about Katie-san’s mumblings.
That is exactly what is fearing the unknown about.
.
I don’t know what will happen to our Hero’s party from now on.
But.
With all the information Emmy told me and the thoughts she has inside her mind.
I sorted all of these in my mind and determined what are the things I need to fulfill.
For Emmy’s sake too—
I will never let this person meet Russell!
Translator’s Note:
- Release 2/5. Please click next.
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“Heart rate accelerates” Yeee! Multiple uploads! “Random nerdgasming weeb noises” …… Brb gotta go change my….. I gotta go change.
Thanks for the chapter.
Is Katie the Sun goddess?
If that is so… I kind of want Russell and Katie to meet just to get that knowledge that our Dusk Goddess is not absolutely sure on.
Rather than that, perhaps she could be another one entirely? Like, for instance, there is Sun, Dusk, Dawn… perhaps a Moon/Night one too? Perhaps the “Sun” is the only one which currently has enough followers though.
honestly, Jannet is my favourite character in this novel. the others kinda annoy me a bit. like the main character is such a naive goody two shoes that it pisses me off, like why would the emotional burden that your friend got from kicking you from the party be your fault. also usually i like it when the two main characters who are bickering smartasses at eachother and i know the goddess is like an intelligent omniscient person but for some reason i feel she is a bit too much of a smartass and rubs me the wrong way. finally, i hate “nice” indecisive characters. like Emmy is portrayed as a nice character but all she does is worry, she keeps saying “ohhhh i feel bad for kicking off russel.” but she doesn’t even do a god damn thing. in the end all she does is run away from her responsibilities, like does she think whats gonna happen to her other friends when she runs away? and this is why Jannet is the best character. maybe kicking off russel wasn’t the best decision but at least she owns up to it. she’s also not a goody two shoes and i mean who can’t relate to doing something just because it feels good to be better at something than other people.
kind of a long rant but the characters just rub me the wrong way, i still like it tho thanks for the chapter